Love Is

em>Love is patient
Love is kind and is not jealous
Love does not brag and is not arrogant,
does not act unbecomingly;
It does not seek its own, is not provoked,
does not take into account a wrong suffered,
does not rejoice in unrighteousness,
but rejoices with the truth;
bears all things, believes all things,
hopes all things, endures all things.
Love never fails.
-Corinthians, 13:4-13:8I am not a religious person, but this is one of the most true, profound comments about love I have ever read. I apologize for my rant… not many people are accustomed to my writing when I have something that isn’t positive to say. However, in my defense, you were warned. I just hate feeling badly for someone else’s feelings, especially when it wasn’t really my doing. That isn’t guilt I should have to bear. I’m too empathetic. It hurts to think I’ve wounded someone. I understand more than ever where men come from when women with too many issues try to play the field too soon. I’m ready. Are you? Oh, lovers and the heartbroken: you too, will heal in time. Let love in.It has been brought to my attention, recently, by several individuals, that I have a startling and uncanny understanding of love. I do. I have a starting and uncanny understanding of people, and of loneliness, and of fear. I don’t give myself enough credit. I trust a lot more than I say I do. I’m more open than I say I am. I’m far more confident than I believe myself to be, and I take many risks in the name of happiness that others are often apprehensive about taking. This is often the reason I am the pursuer. Whoever and wherever you are, future love of my life… don’t be afraid of me…  …I’m waiting.Today at work, I had a great, long conversation with Wanda about love and life. She’s in her 50’s. While we were both dicing onions and trying not to cry (which turned out to be a most successful campaign) we talked about our lives, and how we came to be where we’re at. She and I moved here pretty much at the same time. She lives with her Mom. She’s on her own with her son for the first time in her life. She made a strong declaration about herself, today, and thanked me for helping her come to a realization about it (I’m really glad that I can help just by shooting the shit with you). She is a complete, whole woman, who has a loving son to be proud of, and is not the underestimated, needy and vulnerable woman that men seem to think she is. She is capable, she is just used to the company of a lover. She decided today, that comfort is empty and emotionless. She wants to stand tall alone for awhile, just to show people she can. Good for her. I did that for awhile. It worked for me. Wanda also told me I may want to consider a career in therapy.I am held back by one thing. I feel that I am intimidating to people. I worry they think that my spirit will be too much for them. If I say you are wonderful, you are, no matter the clothes on your back, the roof over your head, the thickness of your wallet or your belly. If I say you are wonderful, then stuff is stuff is just stuff. If I say you are wonderful, you are. There are too many uneasy, self-conscious people. It isn’t a bad thing… but you have to believe you deserve to be loved in order to be willing to accept love. I learned that for myself through trial and error. Nobody has to justify themselves to me. I accept people as they are and never expect them to change. I will encourage them to be whatever their heart desires, I will suppoort whatever endeavor they choose to tackle, however difficult.No, I am not malleable; not pliable or moldable or makeable. I am not someone you can turn into something else. I am a spirit of compromise. Love and friendship requires a halfway point, sometimes. I am someone willing to meet you at the fence, on the property line (so-to-speak). Has anyone considered that if I do something all the way, it might be something I wanted to do? Not every decision I make in my life is forced or even influenced by others. I do things on my own accord, and often.I cave. My possible open mic night songs are:-Where I Stood by Missy Higgins
-Running Away by Midnight Hour
-Porcelain Doll by Megan McCauley
-Champagne Supernova by Oasis

Love cannot be found where it truly does not exist,
nor can it be hidden where it truly does.


~ by Kд§$ị (ИovΔ) on 04/16/2008.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: