Here I Am!

Hello again. I’m sitting in my Mom’s room, drinking Timmy’s out of a paper cup, chatting with my Dad, who continues to lovingly refer to my new Step-Mother as “my wife”. It just serves as a constant reminder for me that she lives in a separate world than I do in my Dad’s life. That’s okay. The smile on his face is enough for me. I just want him to be happy.

We went to Woodgrove Mall today. It’s sad that I have to be in a shopping mall to feel like my life isn’t completely unfamiliar. The world in Kassi’s poor inadequate brain is much changed of late. I’m used to the largeness and excitement of the outside world completely increasing the size of my anonymity. I love being lost in something. Here, who you are is so much more important, your significance (even in your immediate universe) is inflated so much more in a small town.

I miss my friends. I know that things were just waiting to get complicated, with one of my friends getting ready to give his girlfriend the boot because he thought he loved me, and my other best friend moving away… I can’t help that a little of me still feels melancholy. Poor Lauren is going through this moving transition and quitting her job and it must be really overwhelming… and I’m not there for her. I know that’s beyond any realistic control right now, but  my heart longs to support her through it. And with my male friend (I choose not to name) I feel like I ran away… that must have been hard for him to take. But… someone just did that to me. I was the girlfriend in that situation. She probably has no clue. I could never become the person he was hoping I’d be. Still, I miss them, very much.

My cable is all messed up. I wish it was fixed because my brain runs at a million miles a minute and I could really use some vacuous, brainless television to just zone out on. Yay Primetime TV. I just got sucked onto the Grey’s Anatomy bandwagon. Sheesh. Then there’s all my other shows. I miss Veronica Mars. I should sue CWTV for making TV suck. I wish Moonlight was on. *growl*

This is why I love my iPod and my Archos. Download it and it becomes portable. I can watch TV ANYWHERE. LOL. Really, it stems from years of training doing graveyard shifts at the Chev.

Anyhow, I’m tired. Walked around all day. Must. Cuddle. Little… Kiki (my adorable little Longhair Tortoiseshell kitty, who squeaks instead of meowing). She’s Sargeant Cuddle, the master of relaxation and all things nuzzle-like. Have a fabulous day!

Kassi

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~ by Kд§$ị (ИovΔ) on 04/07/2008.

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