Ohai! I Iz Powstin A Powme I Has Ryted.
I cling to my idealistic dreams
Though false they live for me.
I sway against thoughtless shades of grey
and in them my color fades away.
I need a moment to collect the truth
To see what is and not what I thought I knew.
I’m hoping you can tell me the difference
I’m hoping you’ll give me a chance
To prove that my daydream is not unending
and that once woken I cannot be fooled.
There is too much traffic in my head
between all that is seen and what is said
Too many voices holding congress
that creates this distress upon my chest.
I cough and I sigh and I scream and I lie
but the words I’m searching for just seem to fail
or escape, or just hide.
I do NOT want to die.
In the moment when I am expected to open up
To reveal myself, to be vulnerable, true and then become
When I am expected to ascend
to a level above all that transcends,
When I am hoping to conquer and call
When I NEED to just resolve it all
I fall short, I hold back,
And what I should do is dive fully in and attack.
I feel inside me somewhere my true self is caged
I know I have only myself to blame
Scratching fingernails down these erected walls
It’s time to stand and knock them down.
I must be strong and I must stand
Before the silence gains the true upper hand.
Kassondra Staschuk © 2007