Cancer of the Puppy

So last night I had this dream. I was sitting on the couch and for some reason my Mom burst into the room. She had the results from my physical. “You have cancer.” She just said it. Like that. There was no easing me into the notion or the thought- that was it.

In my dream, I collapsed. I just crumpled up like paper and started crying. I felt sick. She told me it was my liver and that it was too late to do anything about. I was going to die.

I remember that in the dream, the next day I went for my first round of chemotherapy. They were going to try to treat it anyway. Everybody was joking about it like I had a zit. “Awww… she’s going to get zapped. That sounds like fun.”

The whole time all I could think about was all the things I’d never do. I wanted to grow up and get married and have kids. I remember feeling like I’d lost everything…


~ by Kд§$ị (ИovΔ) on 10/26/2004.

4 Responses to “Cancer of the Puppy”

  1. You having cancer would really suck… Why would you have such a dream?

    Oh… and kind of off topic, I was thinking about you as pregnent today (for, again, no real reason at all). If you were pregnent, you’d have a powerful urge to not eat pickles. 😛

    • Pickle Fetish

      Okay… me with cancer=suck!!!

      Me pregnant=distant future.

      And nothing. NOTHING!!!!!! Could ever make me want to not eat pickles (unless there were only ever pickles to eat and even then, I might still want to eat them).

      I hope if I ever have a baby that it’s cute. Having a baby is FAR less scary than me with cancer.

      I don’t know why I had that dream, but it seriously disturbed me.

  2. Harsh!

    Sad! I’ve had dreams about terminal diseases before – I think AIDS once and cancer once. You wake up kind of unsettled, yeah? Anyways. Don’t worry, you’ll get preggers in time and make lots of little brats to run around and annoy the downstairs neighbors…

    Sorry. Bitter. People upstairs, grrrr-ness.

    • Re: Harsh!

      Yes, dreams like that are completely unsettling. Then you wake up and it takes you a couple of minutes to surmise whether or not there was any truth to your dream. That part sucks.

      No worries. I will eventually ONE day get pregnant. And I’m kinda starting to wonder why I’m talking about me pregnant a lot. (???) I’m sure that whatever I give birth to will absolutely terrorize the people downstairs (that’s us!! HAHA!)

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