Someone went to California and all I got was this T-Shirt

Well, I’m hoping that when the sun rises tomorrow I will see it in a new and innovative way. I went to see my doctor this morning because I’ve been having really awful abdominal cramps that feel like someone pulled my uterus and twisted it like a sponge. Anyway, it turns out I’m so stressed out that I’m making myself sick. Big surprise there.

I have what is called Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) which is something people have at least once in their lives for a six month period. Anyway, I’ve been perscribed an anti-depressant/anxiety drug called Effexor XR. I just took my first pill about half an hour ago. I was told that as far as my mood goes, the effect should show fairly soon, but reasonably successful stress relief will take longer. I’m on a 20 day dosage.

I hope I don’t have too many of the side-effects. 😦

Steve went with me this morning and he bought me lunch. I love him so much. He is so supportive of me. He was worried that it might be something else, like a pregnancy. I understand his concerns, but I am on the shot. It’s a silly worry to have. I think he’s just as stressed as I am. It was getting to the point though where I couldn’t handle working without feeling like I was going to fall apart.

Tonight was my last closing shift (well my last shift at all) with Felecia. I’m going to miss her. She was my wonderfullest A&W friend next to Jen and Nat. Fefe! *pout* I will miss you so much. See you on Saturday! ^_^”

Anyhoo, nothing else of particular interest. I was curious about the Effexor so I did some reading. It’s a big deal because I’ve never taken anything perscription for my mood disorder before. Wow.


~ by Kд§$ị (ИovΔ) on 04/21/2004.

7 Responses to “Someone went to California and all I got was this T-Shirt”

  1. Effexor

    Was just browsing along and wanted to warn you about Effexor. I was on it once and so was a friend. Check out some internet research on it and search regarding it’s problems with nightmares and stuff. Anyway, I have read that there have been problems with some people on it that when they have come off it, they were worse and in some cases some individuals have committed suicide. It makes you pretty emotionally flat. When my friend came off it he went through some pretty severe nightmares which is apparently a bad side effect.

    Here’s one link and another one.

    Just beware. I am not a fan of this drug – or very many anti-anxiolitics. The best anti-anxiolotic that I have ever used is one for symptomatic problems and it is called Lectopam – or they often perscribe ativan. Then you are only taking it when you are having an episode and are not drugged on it all the time. As a past sales rep for the drug companies, I am not a fan of doctors’ eagerness to give pills. Please be careful.

    Just a concerned person.

    • Thank You

      I very much appreciate your concern. I post things like this in hopes that people with things to say will come forward and tell me about them, because I don’t take pills for things often, actually VERY rarely. The last perscription for pills I had was for a single valium before a concious wisdom tooth removal when I was in Grade 10 (3 years ago).

      I am keeping very good tabs on my side-effects, and I did an enourmous amount of reading on them before I took the first pill. So far the only side effects I’ve had are ocular pressure (bloodshot eyes) and fatigue. I’m not worried about suicide or nightmares, since I’m not taking them as an antidepressant, but rather as an anxiety reliever, and I am on a very small dose for 20 days.

      But thank you so much for your concern… it is greatly appreciated.


  2. Regarding the percriptions, virtually all anti-depressants have a risk of decreased sex drive, though the degree of risk often varies from perscription to perscription.

    Also, about what the person mentioned about ativan, a good friend of mine was given some after a rather severe psychological episode. It works very well, though since it’s meant to deal with seperate episodes it may not be the best idea for you.

    • Ativan

      I don’t need something that will target specific episodes, because I’m not having episodes. I’m constantly, from the moment I wake up to the moment I fall asleep (which isn’t very long) really stressed out, to the point where it is making me ill and I can’t work.

      I can’t handle 21 hours of stress a day on little sleep. I knew this wasn’t going to go away when he told me I had GAD. In fact, my doctor asked me if I wanted to take something. At most I expected some low-dose sleeping pills to rest me up more. I think taking Effexor is worth the risk if I monitor the side effects and keep my doctor and pharmacist up to date on them. I was warned, this may not fix the problems I’m having and certainly not right away, so in a few days I am supposed to go back and determine whether or not to complete my last 10 days of therapy.

      As far as decreased sex drive is concerned I rarely have sex within 20 day periods. I don’t get that kind of time with Steve very often, and we’re both working pretty often. I’m less concerned about not getting any than I am with exhausting myself to death.

      I’m far more concerned with the side effects like increased Blood Pressure, ocular pressure… things like that.

      I’m not worried about nightmares because I wasn’t depressed going into the treatment, actually quite the opposite.


  3. No Worries

    I understand what you say. I too actually have GAD. Have had it for a long time although now that I am older I find that as I have dealt with the emotional issues attached to it, it’s prevalence has subsided and my need to “medicate” it has decreased to basically nothing. Much of my GAD comes from having been born into a family with an alcoholic father. Not to blame him, but the environment tends to breed anxiety. You may know what I mean. From the time I hit 18 I saw all sorts of counsellors, psychologists, psychiatrists and the like. The best help was with social workers who just focussed on my emotional issues. Psychiatrists always want to put you on medication because they assume everything is chemical. I tend to disagree.

    Now however, as the other individual noted, for me, it is more episodal so a prophylactic is not necessary. Much of my anxiety is stimulated in relation to relationships going awry and my own sense of low self worth. Nothing but wisdom of age and recognizing the silly things I say to myself help improve that.

    I’m glad you’ve read up on it lots. Just so you know, it isn’t the side effects while you are on it (other than being emotionally flatlined) but it’s when you come off it to be aware.

    Best of luck.

    • I’ll Be Wary

      My GAD is from accumulated stress. I was sexually assaulted at a young age and both emotionally and legally I am still caught up in the middle of the storm that arose from it. I lost my entire family and nobody believed me. 12 years later I was vindicated and there was still nothing they could do. I’m not the last victim either.

      Also, I’m moving out on my own across the province from the only family I’ve really known for the last 10 years, and I’m moving in with my boyfriend, which is a huge cataclysmic turn of events for me. It’s a massive change and I’ve never dealt with change well since I had so very much of it as a child.

      I saw psychiatrists and doctors and psychologists from the age of six until just a few months ago on and off. Nobody ever perscribed me anything. My parents are also approaching a pretty ugly divorce. My Mom is a heavy alcoholic and we’re staging an intervention in the next week. It’s a lot for me to worry about and I started to heavily burn out.

      I promise to keep my eye out for the side effects once I have finished taking the drug, and please, keep in touch.


  4. Hey There

    Hi there,

    Sorry for the delayed response and perhaps this is not the best venue for discussion. You can let me know. I understand where you are coming from and appreciate your angst and challenges. Life always serves up a bountiful banquet. I remember someone once saying to me that we are only given that which we can handle. So if we find ourselves confronted with such extraordinary situations compared to the simpler lives of our peers, perhaps it is because we have more to offer in regards to wisdom and experience.

    I personally believe in reincarnation and being responsible for my own life, happiness and world. It is a hard route to take but once you make the decision, it gives you strength to know that it is up to you and only up to you to make it what you want. You will draw into your life that which you need to learn. To learn lessons both obvious and subtle.

    I have read some of your other posts. YOu are an insightful and vibrant individual. Sometimes, the more wisdom we are given the more knowledge we have – both good and bad – and it makes life a little more challenging. I know this well and appreciate your circumstances. Although I have not experienced all that you have, I have known a number of very close friends who have and appreciate the effects that are left with them.

    For example, having been brought up in a family of alcoholism, although not great, gave me the wonderful skill of empathy and being able to read the emotional and mental state of individuals in split seconds (of course in the family situation this was for survival – but it works wonders in the work environment) – so what on one level appears to be a negative can also be turned to a positive.

    Your experiences coming in the near future are a wonderful growth curve that is not unusual for anyone in their late teens and early twenties. Try to embrace them and believe that they will give you the knowledge and tools for the futures. And also know that you are not alone.

    Sorry, I don’t intend to sound matronizing – but slogging through the throes of life has been my experience – and good or bad – if I can help, I am glad.

    Take care, and try to meditate (as corny as that sounds) because all the answers are really within yourself – I swear!!!!

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